


Of Hanahaki and High-school

by LavenderSquid



Category: Heathers (1988), Heathers: The Musical - Murphy & O'Keefe
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Cuddling & Snuggling, F/M, Fluff, Hanahaki Disease, How Do I Tag, Hurt/Comfort, I Don't Even Know, I Will Go Down With This Ship, I just love them together so much, Love Confessions, Mild Blood, Modern Era, Near Death, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Sorry Not Sorry, Unrequited Love, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings, if anyone has any good jd and veronica fits please share, it's not abusive this time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-13
Updated: 2019-02-10
Packaged: 2019-09-17 06:30:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 7,474
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16969461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LavenderSquid/pseuds/LavenderSquid
Summary: Veronica didn't know where she would go after high school, but now she doesn't know if she'll live to figure that out.Jason Dean, a kid with a god complex who held his mother's hand as she died from the same disease he now has.Hanahaki, like a soulmate mark but lethal, tethered together and terrified of what saying anything would bring, but more terrified of what happens if they don't.a time limit on their lives, unrequited love that isn't actually unrequited, when a lack of communication with a crush becomes deadly, can they find each other fast enough to save their lives?





	1. Of death and flowers

**Author's Note:**

> I'm really excited to write this, but with finals coming up my upload schedule will be really weird. in any circumstance, no one reads these anyway, tell me what you think!

This wasn’t supposed to happen to me. It’ genetic and no one else in the family had it. This sort of thing didn’t happen to me. This isn’t actually happening, i’m going to wake up any second. 

I didn't wake up, because it did happen, and no matter how much i wished for them away, the blood splattered roses remained at my bedside trash can. Hanahaki. Bad news.  
Ok that was just a one time thing an odd misfort- that thought was cut off by another midnight black, blood splattered Acaia crawled out of my throat and joined the others in the trash. 

I pull out my computer, the bright screen wakes up my sleeping eyes, with the same big bright lettering “HELLO VERONICA, WELCOME BACK” i quickly typed up hanahaki death ratio 10:1 oh god, no no no hanahaki cure returned affection i clicked the search bar again hanahaki cure without affection no results hanahaki contraction there are two ways hanahaki occurs, 1. It runs in the family 2. The person of your desires has family with hanahaki i feel sick, my throat scratches as i feel another flower making it’s way up

I typed out similar things with each passing second further tying the growing knot in my stomach, i felt like i was going to vomit, i turn around, bend over, more flowers. Tears well in my eyes, I can’t believe i’m never going live past high school. 

 

(JDPOV)

I don’t sleep, i don’t think i could anyways especially considering what just happened, i take a large gulp of my slushie thank god 7-11 is always open, i try to forget what the fuck just happened, but just as i swallow i fall to my knees in agony as i feel more arbutus lunging out of my throat, as the new bouquet of blue flowers stained in flecks of my own blood grows in the pile. I know what this is. This is how mom died, i held her hand as she coughed up a dead wilted flower and died. Hanahaki…. I’m going to die.


	2. Of flowers and futures

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I said my schedule will be wack, but I just love writing this so much! finals are next week so be prepared for that, but then there's winter break so that's 2 weeks all to myself and my computer. so you take some you lose some I guess.

The sun finally rises, meeting me in being awake, how could I sleep, how could anyone sleep after that, I sat up and immediately felt more acacias rising like bile in my throat, I turned over and coughed them up. They were still just as black, the color hadn’t changed, good, I have more time. In the shower is when I finally break down. I sit on the ground with the scalding water insulating my back as I just sob, the floor of the shower is covered in red flecks and midnight flowers. I leave for school early, my parents are usually still asleep when I leave for school. I can’t eat, I stop by the 7-11 for a slushie, maybe I can hold that down, I pay and walk out, blue coat on, big slurp in hand, and then I see him. The guy from the fight yesterday, it’s just a glimpse of his shaggy brown hair, and deep eyes, his trench coat follows him like a shadow, he doesn’t see me, so thankful he also didn’t see when I hid around the building to cough up more flowers. More flowers… it’s him, Jason Dean, the outcast, the social suicide, the one all three heathers and therefore the entire student body hated, Jason Dean is my soulmate.

 

Thoughts race in my head as I walk to school, this at least answers a few questions, he has hanahaki in his family, but because this is unrequited love thing, I guess it means he doesn’t know that I even exist. I'm so screwed, either Heather will kill me, or the flowers will kill me, or a mixture of both. 

I can’t think, not in math, or in english, everytime I close my eyes I see him and instead of butterflies in my stomach it’s black acacias hidden in my bag. I stay silent at lunch. Duke looks disgusted for whatever reason, Mac looks concerned and Heather sits down. Duke speaks up immediately, “Heather I think there is something very wrong with little blue bird over here” Mac speaks up “Yeah, Veronica are you ok? You had a nasty cough in french class, I'm worried about you.” duke rolls her eyes, and Heather looks embarrassed I give her a soft smile that she returns. Duke looks to Chandler for answers like a young child looks at god. “Oh boo hoo, little blue here is sick with a cough, that’s no excuse. There are no sick days for being popular, get up we’re doing the lunch poll.” Heather C looks pointedly at me. I barely manage to croak out “Heather I can barely speak.” she glares at me “do you want pity? Do you want a sick day of being popular? Well I'll give you as whole week, you can come sit with us next monday when you’re done being a baby.”  
I can’t do anything but pick up my backpack and try to find a place to sit, it feels like the whole cafeteria is watching me, I look around me, no one is watching except for deep chocolate brown eyes, that meet mine. And the flower that was crawling up my throat went further down the closer I got to him. He continued his gaze on me, it felt like he sees right through me and he knows it to. I i get halfway there, I turn my head to see all three heathers staring at me, Duke looking disgusted (what else is new) Mac gave me a smile and a thumbs up before shrinking away from chandler, then she looked back at me, snarling glare, a face of a devil with eyes that could stab me. Eyes that also dare me to walk back to her, a challenge to come to her and a challenge to leave, the latter being a death wish. 

 

I try to sum up all my courage, give her the best toothy grin I can, flip her of, then turn around and make my way to the table that Heather calls “loserville” huh, loserville, population 2.


	3. Of flowers and fuzzy feelings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Veronica, exiled goes to join loserville. let me know if you want to see both pots, i'm leaning for toward being just veronica, but let me know what you think.

JD POV

I left the 7-11, went home and just sat on the couch, staring at the ceiling or coughing up flowers until the sun rose, don’t know where dad is, honestly don’t care. I fling my trench back on, and ride over to the 7-11 on my harley. Just as I pull up a flash of blue runs to the side of the building. I cough out practically a bouquet arbutus, the same shade of blue. I walk in and smirk as I see the cashier sigh and pull out a big gulp, put on the lid and pull down the cherry tab on the slushies tab, I put down the money, get back on my bike and head to whatever the name of this one is, I stopped keeping track a while ago. 

Up until lunch the day is fairly uneventful, in history we had a partner project and the yellow Heather asks to be my partner, I think it’s some kind of sick joke, but then I remember, this is the Heather that is nice when she’s not under the influence of the queen bee. Then lunch.

The lunch table I sit at that everyone calls loserville is populated entirely by yours truly. Blue Heather sits down at the table and continues to cough, I look at her, the blue one always seemed different, more curious, inquisitory, sharp and quick witted. But she also sat with the Heathers, a bit of an oxymoron if you ask me, I look down and lazily move the food on my tray around with a plastic spork, only to look back up and see things getting heated at the Heathers, blue stands up shyly, and yellow gives are an encouraging smile, maybe they’re actually friends? But blue looks angry and defiant, but uncomfortable, I sit back and continue to watch the scene unfold, interested. She starts to walk towards me, I tell myself that it’s because it’s the only empty table but that’s not true, someone, a popular someone is somewhat willingly going to sit with me. She gets about halfway, stops for around ten seconds flips Heather off and joins me. The flowers that were crawling up my throat back down. I widen my eyes, thankful she’s looking away. What a turn of events. 

 

 

Veronica 

As soon as I sit down across from him I feel like Heather is going to come up behind me and stab me, so I push my stuff into the area next to him and move to sit there. This strange feeling overwhelms me. I want him to put his arm around me and hold my hand, I want him to hold me and kiss me like I'm the only thing in the world, I want him to cuddle me and watch cheesy movies, I want his smell, sugar and gasoline and pine and something else I just can’t describe to envelop me for the rest of my life, I want him to love me, I want him to want me, and as the weird warm fuzzy feelings in my stomach continue to bubble up and make me heart swell, three words remain. I want him. 

I want him and I don’t even know his name. I crave him like oxygen and I don’t know anything about him. I love him already and I don’t even know who I love. He opens his mouth and speaks “so you’re a Heather huh?” his voice is deep and soothing with a hint of danger, I can barely think, I can barely remember my own name when I say “actually I'm a veronica. I was recently fired of my duties of being a Heather.” he chuckles, it feels like my heart is going to burst. I continue “so no-name kid, what do I call you?” he turns to me and smiles, “Jason Dean.” I don’t even think about the words that fall out of my mouth “so JD what’s your story?” he smirks and says “oh sweetheart, lunch isn’t long enough to even start.” sweetheart sweetheart I'm stunned silent for a solid minute luckily he continues in his voice as smooth as honey “the nearest 7-11 after we get out, Veronica.” he smiles gets up and leaves.

My name sounds perfect on his lips, three syllables my three syllables sound so perfect. “Jason Dean” I whisper to myself and touch my fingertips to my bottom lip, Jason Dean, the finest sound to ever escape my lips, I feel a tickle in my throat, so turn my back to the cafeteria and cough, I almost forgot about hanahaki, the midnight acacias, more blood than this morning. 7-11 looks like a safe haven.


	4. Of flowers and friendship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> JD and Veronica meet up at 7-11 and get to know each other better

The friendly ding dong of the 7-11 triggers as I exit, cup in hand is sit down on the curb. 

“Cherry huh? Good to know you have taste in your 7-11 choices” I look up and there he is, big gulp in one hand a packet of twizzlers in the other and a goofy smile plastered on his face. He sits right next to me. “So bluebird, what’s your last name?” I raise my eyebrows at him “well if I'm about to tell you my whole life story, I'd at least like to know your last name Veronica.” god how is he so charming? “Sawyer, Veronica Sawyer.” he gives a small smile. “Well Sawyer, where do I begin.” he takes a large gulp of his slushie, staining the inside of his lips, his face grimaces as he’s hit with a brain freeze. 

“I was born to my mom and dad who only got married so their town wouldn’t judge them for have a kid out of wedlock. My mom was really the only person in my life who cared, teachers at school blatantly ignored all the kids beating the shit out of me at recess, but it didn’t matter I didn’t fight back because I could go back home to my mom who would help with homework and listen about my day.” he paused “I'm sure you’re familiar with hanahaki. Well after a few years of marriage my mother actually fell in love with my dad. I just thought she was sick with a cough, she pushed a box with my name on it that had a letter taped to the top, grabbed my hand, coughed up several dead flowers and I watched the color drain from her face. I was 11.” I put my arm around him and without thinking rub up and down on his arms to assure him. “The letter said something along the lines of I was planning on giving you this for christmas, but I think you need it now, it’s too big for you now but it’ll fit when you grow up, everytime you wear it, it’s a hug from me. I love you kiddo, I'm sorry I knew what death was so I screamed and ran out of the house. I didn’t know where I was going but I showed up at a 7-11, the cashier saw a random 11 year old crying, handed my a big red slushie and told me it’s on the house, these things usually help me I just left and walked back home, I drank it too fast and noticed that I didn’t think about what just happened, I couldn’t think at all, and well, that’s where this whole thing came about.” he says gesturing to his drink. “The box had this coat on the inside, and my dad just moved us around, I had two suitcases with all my belongings that I didn’t even bother unpacking a few times. There were 2 promises in my life, the final gift from my mother and red dye number 7.” he moves to look at me, I hadn’t realized I had been crying before he wipes my face dry with his thumb. He lets out a low rumble resembling a laugh “Whatcha’ crying’ for bluebird, none of this happened to you” he gives me a pained smile and looks back down at the pavement. 

I move my hands to his face and force him to look at me when I say “Jason Dean, you beautiful creature, you are not alone.” his eyes look like those of a small boy. “Well Ronnie,” he replies “your turn.”

“Born and raised in sherwood ohio. I had one friend growing up, and my parents had the life sucked out of them at a young age. My dad made the mistake on day at a restaurant by asking if I wanted to try and replicate his signature on the back of the check. I had watched my dad write his name and I saw his letters, I didn’t think it would look anything like his. I press pen to flimsy paper and find my god given talent of forgery. High school roles around and for 3 years it’s just hell, I'm introduced to the heathers, two devils and a confused angel following the crowd. Heather Mac and I were actually friends before day 1 of senior year. I all wanted was to be left alone, I turned my back on the one friend who was with me since diapers, and I get kicked out on day 2. Heather Chandler is honest to god evil.” he gives a small smile “I'm not kidding, she is the devil, I want to kill and not for selfish reasons you have to believe me, she is a terrible person a fake and truly ugly to the core. My life has been dry and boring, with a dash of evil. I am a damaged person, I am awake and real in a sea of mindless, lifeless, mannequins.” he gives me an interested look I continue “honest to god you are the only person who I can hold an interesting conversation, and we met today.” he smirks to himself. 

“Thanks for beating the shit out of ram and kurt, those idiots needed that.” he laughs heartily then looks at me “Ronnie, I get the feeling we are going to have a hell of a time together.”


	5. Of flowers and fumbling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Veronica goes with JD

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess what fellas? it's winter break which means that you're probably going to get another chapter today! I really love seeing where this is going.

“8376 west catherine.” JD says with a hint of smug in his voice. “Am I supposed to know what that means?” he smiles at my retort “it’s my address, in case you ever feel like dropping by.” I smile to myself at that. He shrugs to himself “You could meet my hamster, we could go on slushies runs.” he looks at me nervously waiting my reply “I’d like that.” I feel stupid for wanting to go now, for wanting the intimacy of seeing someone’s room, i’m about to ask to go with him now, I stop myself… then I don't “i’d quite like the formality of meeting your hamster now if that’s alright.” 

god that sounded stupid, he probably thinks i’m stupid I turn to look at him… his cheeks are about as red as the drink in his hand. “Uh yeah… I mean his name’s slushie.” I laugh, he smiles at me, he seems proud he was able to make me smile. “You wanna motor?” he stands and offers his hand down to help me up, I grab it “gladly, where’s your ride?” I become very aware of the fact that he does not let go of my hand. He stops in front of a motorcycle that I assume to be his. “This is it.” he swings his leg up onto the other side with ease, which is when I realize how much taller he is, i’m practically going to have to climb up there.  
He notices too, lets out a chuckle and holds out his hand for me to take, and sticks out his foot as step stool. I push myself up from his foot, swing my leg over, move my hand from his hand to his shoulder. “Before we go, i’m assuming you’ve never been on a motorcycle, since there aren’t seatbelts, the safest way for a passenger and pilot to drive is for the passenger to loop their arms around the pilot, scoot in as close as possible and hold on. This creates an anchor for the passenger.” I press myself flush against his back and hold onto his chest. I rest my head on his shoulder blade, he seems to relax under my touch. When he starts to drive it’s a bit scarier than I thought so I hold on tighter, I feel safe.  
Enveloped in his smell, surrounded by him, my heart flutters and swells holding on to him, I watch the streetlights go by like little blips, temporary stars. I become aware of the fact that i’m going to have to get up, and even more aware of the ever growing thought that I don’t want to go. I’m not going to have an excuse to hold him or for him to hold me, and I don’t want that to happen. The bike slows down, turns and stops.  
Signaling the end of the trip, “alright we’re here.” my brain doesn’t really absorb what he said “ayy uh you can let go now.” I feel really embarrassed all at a sudden. I let go and immediately miss his warmth. He swings his leg back over and offers his arms out to me to help me down, I grab his forearms in the hopes that I don’t fall and make a fool of myself. Hoping is clearly not enough. I stumble forward and my face almost meets the concrete on his driveway, but instead when I fall forward my head lands on a leather covered chest. Shit. I feel strong hands holding my upper arms. I sort of stand there panting for a bit before I feel the chest vibrate beneath me “you alright?”i straighten myself up to reply “yeah, pretty embarrassed though.” he chuckles “don’t worry about it, let’s go inside.” he walks up to his door and opens it like a game show host with a smile on his face that turns me into a puddle,i walk in and he closes the door behind me.


	6. Of Flowers and Fuzzy friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Veronica meets slushie and learns more about JD

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really excited to post this chapter, I'm sorry I haven't been consistent but there's been family drama, and my grandma just had major eye surgery (her retina detached) so yeah.

He leads me up the stairs and into his room, when he flicks on his light it’s surprisingly clean for a teenagers room, matchboxes scattered about, graphic tees, a dresser with a cracked mirror above it, in the corner a picture of a small boy smiling being held by an older woman also down at him, on the dresser was a pressed flower, a sapphire and sterling ring, bandages, empty big gulp cups, and sheet music. He has a saxophone laying in the corner of his room on top of a writing desk next to his bathroom was a cage with the door open.   
JD sits on his bed holding his hamster. I sit next to him, “Can I ask about the mirror?” he turns to me “you can ask anything, there are no stupid questions.” the lunch poll Heather runs would disagree with that last part but that didn’t matter at the moment. I go to the mirror to begin my analysis. “First of all, you were a very cute kid” he chuckles at that “I didn’t know you played the sax, but personally I would have pegged you as more of a chopin kinda guy, but Bach’s not bad.” his crooked grin widens “your mother was very beautiful and seemed like a lovely person,” his smile fades as he looks more at slushie “i’m assuming this was her ring, and her flower” I move back to the bed and wrap my arm around his shoulders “I would have loved to meet her.” his tear filled eyes meet mine “she would have loved you Veronica.” his voice wavers. I don’t see a tough guy, I don’t see mr. no-name-kid who beat the shit out of two bullies. I see a small boy lost, and terrified.   
I hold the hand not holding slushie “Jason dean you are a beautiful human being.” he smiles sarcastically “wanna hold slushie” he outstretches the hand holding his hamster. I take it and smile. JD gets up and replaces some of the water in Slushies crate.  
“Do you ever get scared Veronica Sawyer” I quirk my eyebrow as he turns to look at me “you’ll have to be more specific.” his crooked smile fades slightly “Hanahaki.” my face goes white “my mom died from it, she was married and had a kid and still died from it. I watched it happen. Which means that I have it.” he smiles again “and I'm not concerned for me, oh no I frankly don’t care if I die, I'm worried for whoever had the misfortune of getting paired up with me. They got slapped for two reasons, not only do they have hanahaki, a disease that doesn’t run in their family so they got stuck with that, then they got stuck with me.” he laughed “she got paired with broken glass, she got slapped in the face with fate, she dies if she doesn’t confess to loving a psychopath. She might die because…” he swallows hard and his smile falters “she might die because I don’t know if I even have the capability of love anymore. There’s one person in my life who thinks I'm not beyond repair.” he moves his head into his hands “you. Veronica you are the only person who thinks I'm worth being fixed.” he looks at me “not eve talking about how my life’s time limit started a few days ago, which means she goes to westerburg which is just fucking excellent, the real cherry on top, because now I have to go to school, or I risk death, which is just awesome.” his eyes start to water “I don’t want to die, because I've seen how hanahakI fucks with people, what it does to them to their family, but I can’t fathom a world in which someone loves me and puts in enough work with me to put the pieces back together.” he runs his fingers through his unkempt raven hair.

I move to kick off my shoes, he interprets this as me trying to leave. He grabs my wrist forcing me to turn back to him “please.” he looks desperate “please don’t go, I'm sorry I've been venting this and” I cut him off, “Jay, calm down, I was taking off my shoes and calling my parents to tell them I'm spending the night with Heather.” he looks confused “you’re spending the night with Heather?” I roll my eyes after telling my parents. “No dumbass I'm staying here with you.” he laughs and rolls back on the bed, Slushie squeaks in his crate seeming to laugh with him.  
“Well” he says sitting up and scooting further onto his bed as he pats the space across from him “your turn to vent.”   
I scoot in I sigh getting myself ready for what was about to commence “well my timer recently started too. I have hanahaki. It doesn’t run in my family. I got kicked out of the Heather table because I refused to speak, because my throat was torn up due to coughing up black acacias. I'm not telling my parents because they would get the surgery, therefore killing the person I'm bound to, so you’re the only person I've told. In fact you probably know the most about me, isn’t that weird, 17 years of life and a person I met today knows the most about me. That’s because if they” I point out the window gesturing to the world “got to know me, the would realize how batshit crazy I am, exactly extreme I am” he chuckles “the extreme always seems to make an impression.” 

Huh. “I think that’s why we work.” our eyes meet and for a moment we see right through each other “your crazy matches my crazy, big time.” he laughs “do you want to watch a scary movie?” he perks up at that “hell yes, but I'm changing into pajamas before that happens” he states “sounds good” he raises his eyebrows “do you want to wear pajamas too?” in all honesty I do, it sounds comfortable and cozy, but then again “Jason Dean, you know for a fact that I am not equipped with pajamas, why would you dangle the sweet offer of cozy pajamas?” he chuckles at my retort “that was my charismatic and dashing way of asking if you wanted to borrow one of my shirts and pajama pants.” oh oh why the fuck did the temperature in my face just increase drastically?   
“Uh yeah, I'd like that, thank you.” he gets up, opens a drawer and shuffles through it “while I look for two pairs of clean pajama pants, you can go through my closet and look for a shirt ya want” I immediately get up and go to the closet having something to do, finally. Go through his graphic tees the patterns are interesting, a skeleton smoking a cigarette, a revolver covered in flowers, an anatomically correct heart with the texture of a grenade, etc, then I found a shirt that was a simple black tee with a blue wave on it.   
I shuck off my blazer on the floor and unbutton my dress shirt and have it join the blazer on the floor, I pull on JD’s shirt, and laugh at the way it ‘fit’ me. I know his shoulders are broad, and I know he’s taller than me but I didn’t realize exactly how broad his shoulders are, or how much taller until I see that the sleeves almost hit my elbows and the bottom of the shirt would function as a very very short skirt.   
I turn to ask him for pants when I'm greeted with the pleasant sight of JD with his shirt off, at least it would have been pleasant if not for the peculiar shapes on his arms and back, I don’t even realize that my feet have moved, I don't realize that my arm was outstretched to him until I felt his skin beneath my fingertips. He flinches and turns to me. These were burn marks, his dad was putting out cigarettes on his skin, the marks on his back and chest were from the impact of things being thrown at him.


	7. Of Flowers and Fuming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Veronica fucks some shit up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess what? another chapter today! maybe even a third... anyway, this is a direct contrition of last chapter. I really do appreciate any and all suggestions, tell me what I'm doing wrong from right, I listen to all comments and I'd love love love to hear what you have to say. btw this chapter is short but I'm putting up another chapter today, and this one has a natural cutoff/cliff hanger.

And I am filled with white hot rage, because his father did this to him. How dare he? How dare he hurt JD? How dare he touch him, how dare he?. I practically can’t see I'm so enraged. How dare he? “Is your dad home?” I fume “veronica it’s not a bi” I cut him off “Is. He. home?” he shakes his head no. “which room is his, and I swear to god Jason Dean if I have to repeat myself I'll do much worse than I have planned.” the force in my voice almost surprises me, almost, I don’t think I'm capable to feel any other emotion right now, I don’t think I'm capable to think. So when he tells me where it is.  
I. Don’t. Think.   
I storm out of Jason’s room, and slam open the door into the monsters.   
I. don’t. Think.   
I walk up the closest breakable thing, a mirror. Perfect.  
I. don’t. Think   
I don’t process what just happened, all I know now is that my hand hurts like a bitch and the mirror in front of me is shattered. Good. my brain suddenly catches up and realizes the possessive thoughts I had just minutes ago. Not that it mattered. I walk slowly and deliberately back into JD’s room. And the words out of my mouth are so stupid they surprise me “did you find pants for me?” he chuckles until he sees my hand. “What did you do?” he seems both angry and concerned, the adrenaline in my head is still pumping so instead of responding, I slip off my tights and skirt and pull on the pants he had laying out. “Veronica what did you just do to your fucking hand?” I laugh when I think about what I did, “I broke your dad’s mirror” I state it like he’s the dumb one for asking, like what I did was the most logical action. “Why did you do that?” I shrug “ I didn’t like him hurting you.” he pulls his hands into his hair and laughs nervously “so you get glass up your hand?” fuck. I'm probably bleeding on the carpet, I move myself into the bathroom and stand on one side of the sink, he follows me in there holding his first aid kit “when you say it like that it sounds weird, but in my brain it made sense, the extreme always seems to make an impression darling.” I don’t know what I'm saying, the words just drip out of my mouth, like my blood onto the sink. He turns on the faucet “ok cutie let’s get you patched up.” he grabs my wrist and runs the cool water over the scratches he holds my wrist so the water runs down onto my fingers. “Alright baby, these next few bits are gonna sting, first I'm gonna get the mirror out of your hand, then I'm gonna see if you need stitches.” I nod, he starts to apply pressure at the beginning of my hand and move down slowly, and then, fuck who knew moving glass around in your hand hurts? I hear a little clink, signaling that one is out, the process repeats a few more times. “Lucky for you none of these went deep enough for you to need stitches.” he pulls out some gauze and wraps my hand in bandages. Then does something unexpected, he kisses the top of my hand. I tighten the strings on my pants when I get up and tie them. “Thank you Dr. 7-11 MD” he smiles at my bad joke. “I’m gonna make popcorn and put the movie in, I'll meet you downstairs, please don’t break anymore mirrors on the way down Ronnie” he says as he leaves. I start by wiping off the minimal makeup on my face that made no real difference but heather insisted on me wearing. Heather. Heather. Fuck. wait no, I'm not thinking about her right now. Taking a deep breath I think about JD, made easier by his smell surrounding me. And how I haven’t hacked up any flowers. I have to tell him.


	8. Of Flowers and Finality

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Veronica tells JD

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the last chapter I'm uploading today, I'm gonna start bulking up again so I can drop some more soon. I really love sharing this story.

I’m committed to the idea, not the consequences. I die at school tomorrow anyway. It felt strange, walking down the stairs of a stranger who wasn’t a stranger. I've ‘known’ him for one day, but we’ve done nothing but talk for hours, and in a more real sense I've known him my whole life. I take another step forward. I resign myself to the idea that the moment I admit my love for him and he doesn’t share the feelings I'll cough up a final acacia and die. Step forward I resign myself to the fact that I do love him, and I hope to god I can learn everything else about him. Step forward I resign myself to the notion that even if I don’t die tonight, my life with him will be an upward hill battle, having to move in together so we don’t become ill due to hanahaki, dealing with the heathers, and parents, and high school. Step forward, I resign myself knowing that I just mentally said my life with him, I resign myself knowing that whether it be tonight or in several years, I will die with him, it’s almost comforting. I'm at the landing, and the eye of the storm, and I see the back of his head facing the stove the smell of popcorn in the air. I step forward, and think about how fucked my life is, I step forward and almost wish I could live in this moment forever, knowing that everything will change in a few steps, I step forward and he turns to see me, his crooked smile makes my knees weak, I step forward as he pours the popcorn from the stove to the bowls and brings them to the couch. I step forward and I resign myself to Jason Dean. 

JD slings his arm around the top of the couch and back around so just his elbow is off the couch. I sit next to him, and he moves his arm so it’s around me. I snuggle into him, and I'm hit with nerves, I'm going to die, I'm going to fucking die, he doesn’t love me, at least I don’t think he does and before I know it I'm coughing and he pauses the movie and turns to look at me and I try to hide it but it’s too late. Acacias as black as his coat in flecks of blood lay in my hand. He laughs harder than I've ever seen anyone laugh, his head rolls back and he wipes a tear from his eye, I feel embarrassed and I almost start coughing up another one when his laugh gets so intense he starts coughing. He starts coughing, not just a laugh cough, a hanahakI cough, he holds up his hands, and as his head jerks forward and in his hands are blue flowers, my shade of blue. He gives me a toothy smile, blood dripping down his chin and flecks of blood on his teeth, the blood on his chin matching the blood on mine. I put my flower in his hand, and he puts his flower in my hand. I rub the blood off his chin with my thumb. I look into his eyes, beautiful eyes, so dark they’re almost black, inquistory eyes, dark, broken, damaged beautiful eyes. He looks into my eyes his twisted grin speckled in blood burned into my mind forever. The wild look in his eyes translates into what kind of kisser he is, it’s animalistic, like I'm his last breath, like this is the last thing he’ll do before he dies, like I'm the only thing in his world that matters, the only thing that’s left. The taste of cherry slushie still on his lips and on mine mixes with the taste of blood, his blood, my blood, slushie, cherry, lips, who cares anymore? His hands on my hips, I move so I'm straddling him, my hands on his face, running through his hair, touch touch touch it’s not enough. I could have him for the rest of my life and it wouldn’t be enough.


	9. Of flowers and making out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> so sorry, school has been so busy, and I got cast as the wicked witch of the west at my theater. i'm trying really hard to to keep up.

I pull back and rest my forehead on his, panting from the lack of oxygen, I move so that i’m sitting on his lap and I look at him his arm around my shoulder, the other across my lap holding onto my waist. “So how's about that movie cutie?” he says with a grin, I laugh and kiss him again. “How very.” he points the remote at the tv and the intros start to play. I get up and grab the popcorn bowls he left on the table. I don’t have to turn around to feel his eyes follow me, I sit back down. His arm returns around my shoulders as I lean back into him. I throw a piece of popcorn to him, I don’t know why it just feels natural, he catches it in his mouth and smiles,everytime I turn around and see him my heart melts, I press my smile to his, and go back to facing the movie right as the first jumpscare plays, just my luck huh. My whole body lurches along with the bowl in my hands and I feel the contents of the bowel find its place covering me and JD. he starts laughing, I playfully slap the arm around me “it’s not funny dickhead” he continues to laugh “i’m being serious!” I throw a piece at him he wipes a tear from his eye “it can’t possibly be so funny that you cry laughing.” his smile melts my heart again, it’s crazy what that smile can do to me. “Oh sweetheart, i’m sorry” he aims to kiss me but I turn my head last second so he kisses my cheek instead, he gasps and holds his hands to the space over his heart in mock heartbreak “Veronica Sawyer I am absolutely emotionally destroyed over here!” he falls back into a fit of laughter then says “I’ve seen this movie so many times that the beginning doesn’t even phase me anymore, I forgot it was there being entirely honest.” I notice that he has dimples. And how the hell am I supposed to stay mock angry at a face like that. “You are forgiven, Billy the Kid” he kisses the corner of my smile. “Don’t worry babe, i’ll fight off all the monsters.” I can practically hear the crooked grin on his lips. And I know he meant it as a joke but he just said out loud that he would fight for me. He’d fight off all the monsters for me. Although the monsters in the movie are fictional, something tells me he would fight them. My own billy the kid would keep me safe. I rest my head on his shoulder. He presses a kiss to the top of my head and says “Nothing will hurt you while you’re in my ams. Nothing will hurt you now that you’re mine. That is more than a promise. That’s a prayer. A prayer to us, to our love. Our love is god.”


	10. Of flowers and fights

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> double upload today, because i'm really sorry

I feel oddly safe, maybe that’s why i fell asleep during a horror movie, i awake with a start as soon as my pillow jumps. Must’ve been a jumpscare nevertheless i’d rather be awake when i’m around JD it appears as though my head landed in his lap. His hand is poised above my hair telling me he was probably petting my hair. I sit up and see his face. He looks worried and a bit panicked. He looked afraid. “Babe what’s wrong?” he looks even more panicked due to my last comment. His arm around my shoulder pulls me closer as his grip on my upper arm tightens. I’m about to ask my question again when i hear “Babe? Huh, didya manage to get a girl not creeped out by you?” a gruff voice mocks. The source of the sound is a fat burly man, big bud dean. “Maybe not now son.” why is he’s calling his dad son? How is his voice coming out so calm and clear when he’s terrified? “Nah pop, i wanna know ‘er name” he insists, the look in his eyes, his demeanor, i’m more than unnerved, and keeping in mind what he’s been doing to his kid i don’t know what this feeling is at the pit of my stomach but i don’t like it. “Veronica.” god my name sounds so good out of his mouth. I snuggle further into his chest, my legs curled beneath me, in an attempt to make him feel safer. “Well dad can i get a last name?” jason looks more panicked than ever. He opens his mouth and closes it. “You already know more about me than i’d like.” the words fall out of my mouth before i can keep them in. “So looks like you got one that’s not creeped out by you, and has a sharp tongue. Color me impressed.” JD coughs. Big bud refuses to speak directly to me, only talking to me through Jason. “Dad, can you, not, right now?” his dad glowers at his defiance. “What did you say to me you little shit? You get a little girlfriend and suddenly you’re super man right?” he gets closer “you think you’re all high and mighty?” he gets closer again. And grabs jd by his coat and pulls him close and gets all up in his face. “You. Are. Nothing.” he reaches back his hand, JD squeezes his eyes shut expecting a blow that will never land. Never will anyone hurt him ever again. I shove JD out of the way in a last minute attempt, the punch lands. But not on him. That’s all that matters anymore. Not. on. Him. i rub my jaw where his fist connected. Jason lays on the floor where i pushed him down. The rage in his eyes is almost frightening as he looks at the reddened skin on my jaw, it’s going to bruise. His dad goes up the stairs to his room, when i remember the mirror. I broke his mirror. I hear a laugh coming the upstairs, my eyes widen “Ronnie, don’t worry about it. He never liked the mirror in the first place, he said he was gonna break it tonight. You just beat him to the punch.” i smile at his pun “now if you’ll excuse me, i’m going to go commit murder in the first degree.” he said standing up. The words almost don’t register due to how charming he is. He goes into the kitchen and picks up the knife. He moves hi wrist, the sun hits the knife and a glare hits his open toothed smile.i walk into the kitchen and lean against the breakfast bar “Babe, i hate to be the buzz kill here but you can’t kill your dad.” he steps closer to me, he sticks out his bottom lip comically imitating a child throwing a fit. “Why not?” i put my hand on his shoulder. “Because if you kill your dad, you’re probably going to go to jail.” he shrugs missing my point. “No one gets to hurt you. No body, so why won’t you let me hurt him. Besides, jail can’t be that bad.” he takes another step closer, still admiring his knife, i take in out of his haps and press the non blade part to his lips. “First of all, i never said that you couldn’t hurt him, just that you couldn’t kill him” i lightly tap the back of the knife on his lips i continue “besides, i don’t want to have to visit you in prison, that’d be lame. And i highly doubt that they have slushies in jail.” i put the knife on the counter and sit up on it. He move so his hands are on either side of my hips. His best lip continues to jut out. I lean down and take his bottom lip into my teeth.

I don’t know what will happen come Monday. I don’t know about Westurburg, or really anything about my future, I just can’t wait to tell Martha I’m getting a happy ending.


End file.
